RAW 5.1.2006 - News & Notes
Vince started RAW by gloating backstage about his victory over Shawn and God at Backlash. He said that just like God, he was taking a day off. He named the Spirit Squad as the Co-GMs for the night. The S. Squad announced that Kenny would face Cena for the WWE title and that there would also be a diva cheerleader match.
The announce team was Joey Styles and Lawler; No Coach and no Jim Ross.
The cheerleader match was a tag match with Maria and Torrie v. Mickie and Victoria. It was a normal match, but all 4 divas were dressed as cheerleaders. Trish (who separated her shoulder last night) interfered enabling Maria to pin Mickie for the win.
Johnny, Nicky, and Mikey of the S. Squad took on a team that they called the 'Odd Squad'. It was Goldust, Eugene, and Snitsky. S. Squad won after a spin kick from Mikey on Eugene. The S. Squad seems to be wrestling in tank tops now. Afterwards backstage Matt Striker attacked Eugene and beat him over the head with a dictionary.
There was a parody of the weekly 'This Week In Wrestling History' segment. Vince did the voiceover and showed a clip of the McMahons defeating Shawn Michaels and God at Backlash.
The next match was Kane v. Conway. Before the match backstage the S. Squad told Shawn Michaels that he was going to be the special guest referee and he had to wear a shirt with 'May 19th' printed all over it. After Conway was in the ring and before Kane came out Shawn hit Conway in the nuts and put the shirt on him instead. Once Kane came down he destroyed Conway.
Umaga beat some jobber in a squash match.
Vince was shown backstage sitting with Candice. She asked him to help cure her 'Labiagitis' (is that a real illness?) like he cured her chest cold at Backlash. Triple H then interrupted and Vince told him that he would be the guest referee in the main event. Triple H didn't want to do it, but Vince threatened him and Triple H accepted.
Edge's interview segment, 'The Cutting Edge' returned. He said that he didn't get pinned at Backlash and therefore he should get another title shot. He also ripped into Joey Styles. Edge then introduced his guest - Mick Foley. Foley put over Edge by saying that their match at WM22 was the best of his (Foley's) career and that he did get his WM moment. He showed a shot of Edge's face from after the WM22 match and said that the match took years off of Edge's career. Foley then challenged Edge to a rematch for later in the night. Edge declined but said that he would accept it for next week instead.
Chris Masters cut a short promo on Carlito calling his win at Backlash a fluke. He then turned his attention to RVD and challenged him to take the Masterlock Challenge. RVD came down and as soon as Masters locked it in Shelton nailed RVD with a chair. Carlito then made the save. Nicky came out and did a cheer to announce that Carlito and RVD would face Masters and Shelton in a tag match.
In the middle of the match they showed Vince and Candice making out backstage. During the match Styles was passed a note saying that the S. Squad wanted to see him immediately. Styles left and Haas interfered in the match to give the faces the win.
Styles was then shown backstage with the S. Squad. They said that his announcing was 'lacking spirit'. They said that if he didn't show more spirit during the Kenny v. Cena match that they would tell Vince to make Styles wear a women's cheerleader outfit next week. They then made him practice announcing Kenny as the new WWE champ.
After the commercial Styles was shown coming back down to ringside. Lawler (on the arena microphone) then tried to get Styles to practice announcing Kenny as the new champ some more (jokingly). Lawler then jokingly mocked Styles' 'Oh My God' ECW catchphrase. Styles then said that if he was back in ECW that he would have a hack as a broadcast partner. Lawler found that funny and then Styles shoved him a few times. Lawler thought that he was joking around until Styles slapped him. Lawler then threw Styles down by the face who promptly got up and stormed backstage. Cut to commercial
After the break Lawler apologized to Styles and asked him to come back down to ringside. Styles came out from the back and stood on the stage. He refused to go back down to ringside and pretend like nothing had happened. Styles then cut a 'worked shoot' promo. He said that 6 months ago after the WWE had humiliated Jim Ross, the WWE called him asking him to join RAW. He stressed that he didn't call the WWE and that the WWE called him. Styles then explained how he has been lectured every week about how to call a WWE-style match (Vince does in fact lecture him every week and feed him lines from backstage). He also said that he is constantly being told not to say 'wrestling' or 'wrestlers' and instead use 'sports entertainment' and 'superstars'. Styles went on to talk about how he is also told to call less moves during matches and do more storytelling instead. Styles mentioned how he was bumped from WM22 and Backlash and how he is sick of the WWE and Vince McMahon. He said that he doesn't like hearing about Vince's semen and watching Vince make out with divas to feed his ego. Styles also ripped into Vince for mocking God and said that he hates the WWE fans for buying into all of it. Styles then quit. Afterwards Lawler said that the WWE found Joey Styles in the gutter and that he must have gotten homesick. Lawler also said that Styles should go back to kissing Paul Heyman's ass.
Todd Grisham came out to do play-by-play for the main event. Triple H acted totally uninterested in the match (in character). At one point he punched Cena and was making slow counts. Even when Kenny went for the pin. Triple H later decided to just leave the ring. As he was walking up the aisle Shawn Michaels came walking down in a refereeās shirt. They two of them had a short staredown. It looked as if Shawn was going to do the 3-count enabling Kenny to win, but he stopped and gave the S. Squad the DX crotch chops instead (payback for trying to get Kane to attack him by making him wear the May 19th shirt). Cena went on to win.
It should be interesting to see how the whole Joey Styles angle (quitting, shooting, etc...) plays out since the ECW PPV and restarted promotion are obviously under the WWE umbrella. I'm also curious to see the angle they use to bring Jim Ross back permanently.
wrestleblogger@yahoo.com
<< Home